Screeching

Eastern Screech-Owl Megascops asio

  This feather was recently found nearby in NDG. It is the primary wing feather of an Eastern Screech-Owl. Could it be from the very same portentous bird I saw back in March (exactly three lifetimes ago)? Possibly, hooo knows.

  For those “But collecting the feathers of most birds is illegal!” people out there, settle your teakettle — I plan of disposing of the feather properly. Here’s what I had in mind:

  Five birders selected by a secret committee will be informed that they must meet at a predetermined spot in Mount Royal Cemetery at midnight sharp, on the night of the Autumnal Equinox. They will find a circle of lit red candles there, one for each participant. The owl feather will be placed into the centre of the circle, and lit simultaneously by all five candles. As the feather’s ashes wisp and spark their way skyward, the birders will dance around the flames in a frenzied dervish, hooting and screeching like banshees, fists hanging low. The dawn’s first rays will find the birders scattered and inert, semi-clothed and smeared in the dried blood of the innocent.

  

  In any case, if all that doesn’t work out, it would be a hell of an idea for quirky theme weddings.